Things People Never Tell You About Parenthood

Well actually the title is a bit misleading, because by now you’ve probably read a million of these. But there are a couple of things they don’t say, and I’m definitely including them …

This is my list of things people never tell you about parenthood:

1. COLD DRINKS
You will learn to love cold drinks – tea, coffee, milo … anything that should be hot, will now be enjoyed cold.

2. SLEEP IS DIFFERENT
You’ve actually probably heard this from everyone – you won’t get to sleep anymore. It’s not quite true – the type of sleep you get will be terrible. You’ll start falling asleep and your baby will wake up. Or your baby will be sleeping and you’ll be trying to get to sleep and imagine them crying. It’s a different type of sleep. So far, my kids are 3 and 5, it isn’t perfect.

3. RELATIONSHIPS WILL BE TESTED
A baby truly tests everything in your entire existence, including your relationship. Be sure to keep communication open with your partner and remember to be honest with each other. You will both be feeling different things and going through different things, so it’s important to remember to chat. ALSO – relationships with your own parents AND your in-laws can be tested too. During the first year of your baby’s life is truly the toughest in my opinion – so just keep an open mind. Always be the bigger person and remember to be kind. “Kill em with kindness” is a motto of mine.

4. TWO PAST POO O’CLOCK WILL CHANGE
You will never know what it’s like to be able to have a relaxing poo. After birth = no. Screaming baby = no. Toddler = no. Maybe when they’re teenagers … maybe.

5. YOU PROBABLY WON’T LIKE YOUR BODY
And that’s ok. Shit you’ve had it for twenty odd years (give or take depending on your age), so it’s only natural to be shocked at how it is after giving birth. Don’t stress and don’t worry – time changes everything and you will learn to accept it.

6. YOU MAY NOT LOVE YOUR BABY STRAIGHT AWAY
That’s ok too. I didn’t know who my first born was when I looked at her – took me a few weeks. As you will learn when you become a parent – time changes everything.

7. THE WASHING WILL BE NEVER ENDING
I like to think back on my time as a non-parent and dream about the fact I only used to do one wash a week. And that wash never included poo or vomit.

8. NETFLIX WILL BE YOUR FRIEND
At 1am in the morning you’ll need something to keep you sane, time to embrace Netflix and the art of binge watching. You can check out the list of my favourites to watch here.

9. EMBRACE THE INTERNET
The internet is your friend. Embrace it. You may not be into that kind of thing, but if you’re stuck at home and have binge watched all of those TV series on your list, turn to the internet for comfort. Especially The Parenting View LOLOL. Shameless plug.

10. YOU MIGHT GET POST NATAL DEPRESSION
Reality is, you might get post natal depression. Please don’t feel ashamed about this – it’s a chemical imbalance that occurs when your hormones are out of whack. Don’t be too hard on yourself. If you’re worried, check out my post HERE. Don’t be afraid to talk about it either. If you can’t confide in your partner, your family or your friends, then come and chat to ME online.

11. SOMETIMES PARENTING ISN’T PRETTY
Sometimes you have stuff coming out your fufu. Or your baby vomits / spills all over you. Or sometimes there’s poo – lots of poo. Sometimes parenting isn’t pretty. It’s ok – a shower (which might not happen as often as you want) will happen eventually. Most parents understand.

12. YOU WILL HEAR A LOT OF OPINIONS
People will offer their opinions left right and centre. It’s just how it works. You become a parent – you get opinions. Remember to take everything you hear with a grain of salt. Try not to get offended – people are generally coming from a place of good. They just want to help you. Just remember that ultimately you make the decisions and you can do whatever you want.

13. IT WILL BE HARD
Your baby / kid will cry. A lot. More than you can ever possibly imagine. You might cry too. You might even cry at the same time. It’ll all be ok in the end but it will be hard.

14. YOU WON’T BE ALONE
For most parents, we all struggle. Your friends might say they’re having a good time, but they could be lying. Or they could be one of the few who are actually fine! But I want you to know that you won’t be alone in your feelings. You will never be alone – there’s too many Mums out there to ever be alone.

15. YOU WILL BE OK
With time, everything changes. Your baby will turn into a toddler, who turns into a threenager, who eventually grows up and goes to school. Eventually they will sleep through the night, and you will be ok.

The last two points are the most important to remember – everything changes with time, and you will never be alone. As parents we are all in this together. It might seem like it won’t be ok, but it will. And if it’s not, then that’s ok too because EVERYTHING changes.

If you had a piece of advice for a new Mum or a Mum-to-be, what would it be? Mine would be “read this list and know that whatever happens it’ll be ok”.

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