Pregnancy

PREGNANCY

Before I had kids, I DREAMED about getting pregnant. I would watch movies with pregnant women and my ovaries would ache. Like seriously – it was ridiculous.

I would see pregnant women in the street and get jealous. Pregnant women looked beautiful to me, and happy. Like WTF MARIA?!

After my husband and I got married, I blinked and was pregnant. To say I was over-the-moon, was an understatement. We told our family but I wanted to yell it from the roof-tops. I was SO freaking excited.

And then, pregnancy hit. The constant nausea, to this day, gives me nightmares.

Like you’ve heard a thousand people say – “Morning sickness” is bullshit. It’s “ALL DAY SICKNESS”. I would brush my teeth and throw up. The smell of mince cooking would make me gag. I would want to throw up every second of every day.

The only time I felt ok (ish) was when I was eating. Yay for food.

I was 75kgs when I got pregnant, and both times, when I gave birth, I was 100kgs. So I put on a cool 25kgs. HOLY SHIT. A lot of that was water though – you should have seen that dam break in hospital – EVERYONE GOT WET.

I also got Pregnancy Pica. Which is where you crave inedible items. Dirt, rocks, petrol, rubber, shoe polish. The weirdest thing you can think of, I craved it.

I licked a potato once because the dirt on it looked amazing.

As well as Pregnancy Pica, I also got Chloasma – or a Pregnancy Mask. Meaning the skin on my face started changing colour. It’s gone now – but was there for at least a year after each pregnancy.

Then I got so big I couldn’t bend over. Going to the toilet sitting up straight, instead of slouching like the sloth I am, was uncomfortable and I dreaded it every time. I couldn’t put socks on. I couldn’t really even pull my underwear up – especially with my second pregnancy. My son was 9lb 6oz when he was born!

Don’t even get me started on my bowel movements. Oh and reflux. DAMN YOU REFLUX.

I wanted so badly to LOVE pregnancy. To glow because of how amazing I felt. But reality is, I almost hated every second of it.

My body was not my own, and little did I realise at the time, it would never be the same.

Other than the crappy feelings, and “normal” pregnancy shit, my pregnancy was relatively uncomplicated. So for that I am grateful. I know so many others have it worse. Of course … it was all worth it in the end …