I’ve just come back from 3 weeks away overseas in Germany with my sister, and whilst I may still be on a high from that time, I feel like a different person.
Well maybe not different, maybe just more enlightened.
My sister is 4.5 years younger than me, but obviously has lived a different life to me. This means I have so much to learn from her; and vice versa.
Her and I are very similar but completely different; we truly loved our time together because we could be ourselves and not worry.
We did the whole sight-seeing thing, and went out to dinner with family and friends.
We also just did nothing; we sat at home at watched Buffy episodes and ate fried chicken.
If either of us didn’t feel like going out, we didn’t hesitate to say something.
When I first got there, my sister had a chat to me and said these four words
NO APOLOGIES, NO EXCUSES.
Meaning, if I didn’t want to do something, I just had to say so. No excuses, no apologies. She said “you never need to do that with me, and you shouldn’t need to do that in life”.
And she’s right – if I don’t want to do something, me saying “NO” should be enough. Unfortunately I’m the type of person who likes to assume how someone will react, so I go on the defensive and offer explanation after explanation and apologise.
Fact of the matter is – if I change my mind, or don’t want to do something, that in itself is enough.
No excuses, no apologies.
We had so many amazing conversations about life, about love and about random shit growing up.
I was away from my children, and whilst it was difficult at times; I needed it so badly.
I genuinely feel refreshed and feel like I have a different perspective on life.
We discussed that “being kind isn’t a weakness” and that in the cut throat world of social media, kindness goes a long way.
There are some utterly horrible people out there, and I’m proud to know I’m not one of them.
I’ve come back to reality with more confidence in myself, and in the decisions I have made thus-far in my life.
I am a people pleaser, and a yes-sayer. I’m not very good at saying no, and I also get upset when people don’t like me.
I feel like after this trip, I’m moving on from that.
I might not be there quite yet, but what happened overseas has truly changed me.
I needed that time away to give me perspective, and it’s done just that.