The Emotional & Crying Child
I have a 2 year old boy, and a 4 year old girl. Both of whom are emotional kids. My 4 year old girl is even more so – especially when she is tired. I have talked about her emotions before: you can read it here.
My 4 year old, if she wasn’t at Kindy, would normally have a day nap – she does on the weekends! My kids have always been big day-nappers – making up for their lack of sleep during the night. My boy still has a day nap – sometimes even has two naps!
However, because she goes to Kindy, she misses out on that nap. Which means at the end of the day, when I pick her up, she’s WELL PASSED IT.
Today was no exception – someone at Kindy must have said “I don’t like you” and she bottled it up until she saw me. And then she let it ALL out.
It’s a huge compliment that she feels she can let me know this, even if it can be hard for me to deal with.
This was a combination of things though – the comment from the child, and the fact she was tired. She sobbed. Her whole body was emotional – I could see it.
In these situations, getting mad or angry doesn’t help. Yelling and screaming doesn’t help.
So these are the five things that I do to help my over-tired-and-emotional child:
1. GET HER HOME
I do whatever it takes to get her home – she needs to be at home where she can calm down.
2. NO YELLING
Yelling at my kids when they’re emotional / tired like this does NOT work. In fact, it’s counterproductive and just makes matters worse.
I hug my daughter and let her know it’s ok to cry. Releasing an emotion, even in a tired situation, is important and one we all need to learn is ok.
When we get home from Kindy, I let her jump up on the couch and chill out in front of a movie – because she’s been at Kindy ALL day, playing, exercising and using her brain, I am ok that she chills out like this. I also look after her, and help her get through the emotion, until she is calm.
We always have a debrief once she’s calmed down – we talk about why she was upset. In this instance, I told her it’s ok if someone doesn’t like you (I need to hear my own words sometimes haha), everyone in this house LOVES her and that is one of the most important things.
As adults we get cranky, so imagine how it is for a child, whose emotions haven’t yet properly developed. Often the smallest of issues can overwhelm a child – because they are just that, a child. Gosh, I struggle as an adult to get through the day – I can’t even imagine what it’s like for a small child.
I always think it’s really important that as adults we remember this – children are children and are not fully developed. Their brains are still learning how to deal with emotions. Try and put yourself in their shoes and think what it might be like to be that overwhelmed. Most of us have been there as adults, so imagine how hard it must be as a child.
Everyone deals with their crying child differently, so let me know below: how do you deal with your crying child, in an emotional / tired situation.